Tag: lockdown

5 years

Today marks 5 years since we entered lockdown. And our lives changed forever. In so many ways, it’s hard to believe it actually happened. It’s like a hazy nightmare or dream. One where you’re not sure if it did or didn’t happen.

I’m still angry, sad, bewildered, grateful and a thousand other emotions. I know others are too. A collective sense of grief for what was, what might have been and what we lost.

Have we’ve truly acknowledged the impacts of Covid? Do we actually know? I joked at the time that it was like we were in a social experiment. Given the current state of the world, I’m starting to wonder if it was.

I read a post today that really made me think. Don’t get me wrong, I wouldn’t have wanted to be making the decisions. Looking back, I’m not sure what it actually achieved. We seem to be in a worse state now than before.

I guess time will tell. History is usually written by the victors. Wonder how it will be reflected in all the chaos, scaremongering and lies…

Ancient woods

I took Bert for a walk through some ancient woods this morning. I’d forgotten how beautiful they are. Even more beautiful in the winter sunshine.

After the grey skies, clouds and fog of the past few weeks, this made a wonderful change.

These woods used to be privately owned, but were bought with donations and put in trust to preserve them. That makes me heart swell. So much of our beautiful woodlands and countryside are being lost. Knowing this will be kept for future generations is great.

These woods were on one of my lockdown walks. It seems such a long time ago that I used to walk miles to keep my head from imploding with it all. Now I have Bert, I can see I will need to rediscover some of the routes again.

Think I might need to invest in some decent walking boots…

Walk it off

I woke up feeling very swirly today. Too many random thoughts going on in my head. So I did something I haven’t done for a while. I walked to the yard. Then grounded myself by shovelling horse poo and giving Buddy a good brush. Listened to a great podcast on the way. It was the perfect one for me to listen to today as really resonated. But also gave me food for thought. Better thoughts than I’d been having.

After doing maid duty, I decided to walk back a longer route. One I used to do in lockdown, but haven’t done for a while either. Made me giggle as I remembered one day when I’d walked up to check on Buddy when the yard was locked down. I wasn’t sure if I was supposed to be there, so snuck up the footpath to see him. In my slightly unsure state thinking I might get told off or had broken some rule, I ended up hiding behind a rather large bush so as not to be seen. Trouble was I was wearing a pink gillet. Not sure I blended in that well. Had to have a stern word with myself at that point. I think I was starting to lose it at that point. Honestly lockdown brought out some very interesting behaviours all round.

Thankfully I can laugh at myself. That helped to calm the storm in my brain. So does walking. Today it was just what I needed. Came back feeling much lighter.

Time to prepare

As we get closer to lockdown easing, I thought it was time to get the preparations really moving.

A little spot of arena eventing today. Buddy flew everything. Not bad seeing as he hasn’t jumped the palisade jump for probably 18 months.

Then I took him round the block in the lorry. Think he was a bit confused at such a short journey. We’re ready for the off!

A year on…

So today is a year since we started lockdown. In some ways, I can’t believe it’s been a year. In others, I can’t believe it’s only been a year.

What a year it’s been. Highs and lows. Tears and tantrums. New beginnings and sad endings. It’s definitely been a rollercoaster. One to remember and one I’ll never forget.

This time last year, I went to man the reception desk for my chiropractor to help her out. Today I did the same. Funny how life does that?! I worked for her yesterday as well.

It was lovely to have a couple of people days. And chat to people.

Fed up

Today had been one of those day where I’ve been fed up. Not because anything major has happened. Just because. Fed up with the weather. Fed up with the restrictions. Fed up of being on my own. Fed up of not being able to do the things I love. Fed up of not being able to see the people I love. Fed up of not getting work. Fed up of feeling useless. Just fed up.

BUT it’s OK to feel like this. Lockdown Limbo is draining and gets us all down from time to time. As they say ‘we’re all in the same storm, but different boats’. Today I’m feeling fed up, battered and a tad seasick.

I’m not after sympathy. I know it will pass. And it’s not all bad at all. I’m very lucky in so many aspects of my life. I have a lovely house, 3 gorgeous cats, a handsome horse and so many wonderful people in my life. Just some days are harder than others.

Watching the kittens play in the snow did make me giggle. Love their footprints on the conservatory steps. You can tell which are Nero’s too.

And my parents had their Covid vaccination today. Roll on a brighter future for us all.