Out of sorts

I woke up feeling ‘out of sorts’ as my Nanna would say. Nothing major has happened. Nothing’s really changed. I have lots to be happy about. On the flip side, lots of things need sorted.

Today I just felt fed up with stuff. The last few weeks have been physically, mentally and emotionally draining for many reasons. I’m very proud of what I’ve achieved, how things have gone and grateful for more deposits in the memory bank.

Throw into the mix the scaremongering, unrest, negative sound bite and riots. There’s a lot of uncertainty again. Lots of frustration. It’s hard to stay in your lane. The world feels rather odd right now. Again.

The Olympics are a great distraction. I’ve cheered, I’ve cried, it’s so inspiring. Not without controversy though. I guess it shows that even at the top of your game, you can make mistakes. Things don’t always go right. It’s how you react to it I guess.

Take me today, I headed to the yard, mucked out and took Buddy for a wander round the village. Only to get home to realise I’d done the whole thing with my t-shirt inside out. Didn’t spoil the view…

Dazzle

I haven’t been at my best today. I woke up feeling grotty again. And fed up. Ended up having a good cry over nothing.

I’m fed up of feeling poorly. Fed up of the constant ups and downs in my life right now. Fed up of feeling useless. Fed up of feeling overwhelmed, lost and frustrated.

I hate feeling like that. I know it’s a reaction to being ill. Being tired. And being stressed.

So I did what I know works to lift my mood. I took Buddy out for a hack. Fresh air, nature and the smell of horse is the best medicine. Buddy is also my Valentine so definitely right to see him today.

It was so mild today that I overlayered when I got to the yard. Found a hi-viz gillet in the back of the Comedy Car. Forgotten just how bright it is. It lifted my mood that’s for sure. How can you be blue when you’re dazzling!

Fed up

Today had been one of those day where I’ve been fed up. Not because anything major has happened. Just because. Fed up with the weather. Fed up with the restrictions. Fed up of being on my own. Fed up of not being able to do the things I love. Fed up of not being able to see the people I love. Fed up of not getting work. Fed up of feeling useless. Just fed up.

BUT it’s OK to feel like this. Lockdown Limbo is draining and gets us all down from time to time. As they say ‘we’re all in the same storm, but different boats’. Today I’m feeling fed up, battered and a tad seasick.

I’m not after sympathy. I know it will pass. And it’s not all bad at all. I’m very lucky in so many aspects of my life. I have a lovely house, 3 gorgeous cats, a handsome horse and so many wonderful people in my life. Just some days are harder than others.

Watching the kittens play in the snow did make me giggle. Love their footprints on the conservatory steps. You can tell which are Nero’s too.

And my parents had their Covid vaccination today. Roll on a brighter future for us all.