Stool sample

Nothing says you’re getting older than the array of tests you suddenly become eligible for. The latest one for me – bowel cancer. I’m all clear by the way. I got the results through today.

Must admit, I was slightly unnerved to receive a testing kit through the post. Even more unnerved having to smear my own poo on a stick and return it in the post.

Yes I know I’m used to shovelling poo. But horse poo is a bit different to my own. I had to read the instructions a few times to check I was doing it right. As someone who writes for a living, that was one job I wouldn’t want. Take a moment to feel for the poor copywriter having to sensitively but clearly explain what to do. Basically stick the stick in the shit and stick the shitty stick in the post. Or words to the effect of…

Sadness

I feel wrung out today. The past few months finally caught up with me. I cried for two hours last night. So much sadness came up. I know I’m processing the things that have gone on.

One of my FB memories was of me hacking with Martine. It tipped me over the edge.

It’s been a lot lately. In recent weeks, I’ve lost my next-door neighbour, my friend, two ex-work colleagues, my close friend has lost her Dad. I’m seeing more and more friends with cancer. My Mum is still in hospital. And my Dad is struggling.

There’s so much sadness weirdness in the world. It’s hard not to be affected. So many people I speak to are struggling with something or other. It’s all very odd right now.

I know that it’ll pass. I’m shattered from a full on period of work. Even by my standards, lat week was bonkers. I’m also emotional as it’s Martine’s funeral this week.

So I’m cutting myself a lot of slack. I know what’s going on. So I went and spent time with my handsome boy. And for a few hours I put everything down.

Legacy

Well we did it! Today’s show at Carleton Riding Club was in honour of this amazing woman – Martine Holden.

I’ve know Martine for a long time now. She’s one of the few people I actively seek out for advice with Buddy. She’s the reason I wanted to go to BHS camp. Now I’ve lost count of how many I’ve been to. She’s the reason I joined Carleton Riding Club. Now I’m on the committee.

So when we decide to do a fundraiser for the charity of her choice, I jumped at the chance to be play a part. Not sure I realised I would have to walk 6.5 miles though!

It’s been a fabulous day indeed. Seeing everyone in their hi-viz competing was just brilliant. People really embraced the cause and the chance to honour Martine.

There was a lot of love shown for her. I haven’t done the final count yet, but we’re heading towards £2,000 for the East Anglian Air Ambulance.

Martine, you’ll never know how much you’ve done for me. So I will pay it forward and be more Martine…